We Asked a Meeting Scientist How to Make Meetings Better — Here's What He Said

Edited by Brandi Neal

How to Fix Meetings with Dr. Steven G. Rogelberg

Meetings get a bad rap—and often, they deserve it. They're frequently too long, too crowded, and too aimless. But it doesn’t have to be that way, Dr. Steven G. Rogelberg, organizational psychologist and author of  The Surprising Science of Meetings and Glad We Met: The Art and Science of 1:1 Meetings.

Dubbed by Adam Grant as the world’s leading expert on fixing meetings, Dr. Rogelberg shares not just why meetings go wrong, but how to make them right—starting with a surprising truth: the one type of meeting people want more of is the one-on-one.

Dr. Rogelberg joined Radical Candor author and co-founder Kim Scott and Principal Coach and Podcast Host Amy Sandler to discuss what you can do to radically improve your meetings today.

Why Meetings Suck (+ What It’s Costing Us)

Over a billion meetings are happening globally every day—and that number might even be conservative. Yet few organizations treat meetings like the massive investment they are.

“Meetings are arguably the most expensive thing organizations do that they don’t evaluate in any way,” says Dr. Rogelberg. He points out that up to 15% of an organization’s personnel budget can go toward meetings. Compare that to IT or marketing—and yet, where’s the meeting oversight?

And the human cost? Real, too. Surveys show that employees often list “too many meetings” as their top workplace time waster. And here’s the kicker: managers think meetings go well. Attendees often don’t.

Radical Candor Reality Check

At Radical Candor, we call this a classic case of Ruinous Empathy — people sitting through bad meetings because no one wants to speak up. Instead of rolling your eyes after the fifth Zoom call of the day, it's time to have a meeting about meetings.

Start with Intent: The Power of the Agenda Question

One of Dr. Rogelberg’s most actionable tips? Rethink your agenda. Instead of listing topics, frame your agenda as a series of questions to be answered.

Why does this work?

• Questions clarify purpose.

• Questions help you invite only the right people.

• Questions allow you to measure success (Did we answer them?).

• Questions tap into our natural desire to contribute.

If you can't come up with a question to answer, maybe you don’t need a meeting at all.

Kim admits that even seasoned leaders sometimes call meetings to figure out what they’re trying to figure out. Framing the meeting around a well-crafted question helps leaders lead with clarity and candor.

Ruinous Empathy vs. Radical Norms

Meetings often fail because people don’t say what they really think. Kim jokes about inventing a “Ruinous Empathy” buzzer—a lighthearted way to call out when something is going unsaid or when a comment slides into "obnoxious aggression."

Dr. Rogelberg loved the idea—not because everyone needs a buzzer, but because even joking about it starts a norm: this is a space where candor is welcome.

The lesson? Be explicit about the kind of conversations you want to have. Model candor, invite challenge, and treat meeting norms as sacred.

Small Habit, Big Impact

Try this Radical Candor experiment: End your next team meeting by asking, “Was this meeting worth your time?” It might feel risky, but it’s how you start building trust and accountability around time and communication.

Create a Culture of Stewardship

What separates a good meeting from a bad one? One word: stewardship.

“Great meeting leaders see themselves as stewards of others’ time,” says Rogelberg. That means thinking intentionally about how to lead, who to include, and how to follow up. It also means not treating people’s time as endlessly renewable.

Just like you wouldn’t serve guests a stale meal, don’t invite your team to a stale meeting.

A little planning goes a long way:

• Set a clear purpose.

• Keep meetings lean and focused.

• Use silence strategically (more on that below).

• End with clear action items—and ideally, action for the manager, not the employee.
  
  

The Surprising Power of Silent Meetings

If meetings are for conversation, isn’t silence a problem?

Not at all.

According to Dr. Rogelberg’s research, brainstorming in silence—using shared docs or chat tools—generates more ideas and better ideas than talking out loud. Why?

• Everyone can “talk” at once.

• It reduces power dynamics (like the boss’s voice dominating).

• It supports more inclusive participation styles.

At Radical Candor, we believe in meeting people where they are. Not everyone processes ideas in the same way. Silence isn’t awkward—it’s productive.

1:1s: The Most Valuable Meeting You’ll Ever Have

"We’ve slammed meetings pretty hard," Amy says. "But in the research, there’s one meeting type people want more of, not less.”

It’s the 1:1.

These meetings are fundamentally different. They’re not status updates. They’re not performance reviews. Done well, 1:1s are deep conversations between a manager and a team member, centered around the employee’s needs—not the manager’s agenda.

A 1:1 Is for the Employee, Not the Boss

The best 1:1s sound like this:

• “Help me understand…”

• “What’s on your mind?”

• “What support do you need from me?”

• “What’s getting in your way?”

• “How can I make this easier?”

This isn’t about micromanaging. It’s about showing up as a human and building real trust.

Scheduling 1:1s for Success

Want your 1:1s to work? Dr. Rogelberg and Kim Scott offer these guidelines:

• Cadence: Weekly is ideal. Bi-weekly can work. Monthly? Too infrequent to build trust.

• Length: 20–30 minutes is enough if it’s high quality.

• Location: Ask the employee! Manager’s office or neutral ground is preferred. Walking meetings? Mixed reviews.

• Ownership: The employee sets the agenda. The manager listens—and leaves with action items.

• Tone: This is not the time to give critical feedback. Save that for in-the-moment conversations. Use 1:1s to solicit feedback from the employee, not deliver it.
  
  

Pro Tip from Kim

Treat your 1:1s like a lunch date with someone you admire. Look forward to it. Bring curiosity. Respect the time. This shift in mindset can transform the experience—for both of you.

Don’t Skip the Close (or the Follow-Up)

How you end a 1:1 matters. Before the meeting wraps:

• Summarize commitments: “Here’s what I said I’d do; here’s what you plan to explore.”

• Reconfirm support: “Is there anything else I can do?”

• Ask for feedback: “How can I make these meetings more useful for you?”

Then document it—lightly. A quick note in a shared doc or email keeps the loop tight and transparent.

1:1 Mindset Tips for Direct Reports

If you’re an employee walking into a 1:1, here’s how to make the most of it:

1. Know what you want. What do you need help with? What’s keeping you up at night? Say it.

2. Ask for help. This is not a performance test. It’s a connection moment.

3. Reinforce the behavior. If your manager shows up with curiosity and support, thank them. Positive reinforcement works both ways.

Managers aren’t perfect—and that’s okay. But your willingness to engage candidly helps them become the leader you need.

Think Like a Steward, Schedule Like a Pro

Kim and Dr. Rogelberg agree: if your calendar doesn’t reflect your values, neither will your actions. That means:

• Block time for thinking and flow—and protect it like it’s sacred.

• Cluster meetings to preserve deep work time.

• Leave 15-minute gaps between meetings so people can breathe, reset, and be fully present.

Your calendar is a signal. Be intentional with it.

Last Word: You Can’t Email a Relationship

The 1:1 is the most important meeting a manager has with each of their direct reports. It’s where trust is built. It’s where connection happens. It’s where people feel seen, heard, and supported.

“You can’t email a relationship," Kim and Amy say. "So treat it with the care it deserves."

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