What is the 'Lazy Girl Job' Trend? There's Actually Nothing Lazy About Work-Life Balance
The recent viral TikTok trend, the “lazy girl job,” is the latest evidence that Gen Z is tired of hustle culture.
4 min read
Kim Scott
Nov 27, 2024 12:06:20 AM
Table of Contents
*This article has been adapted from Radical Candor: Be a Kickass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity by Kim Scott with additional reporting by Brandi Neal. Learn more about why you don't have to be passionate about your job on the Radical Candor podcast.
It’s a basic axiom that people do better work when they find that work meaningful. I don’t disagree with this basic premise. However, bosses who take this to mean that it is their job to provide purpose tend to overstep.
You don't have to be passionate about your job. The folks who work for you don't have to be passionate about their jobs either.
Everyone from Stanford Scientists to Oprah agrees that your job is not always going to, nor should it always, fulfill you, and it’s unrealistic for companies and managers to demand passion for a position as a job requirement.
Insisting that people be passionate about their jobs can place unnecessary pressure on both boss and employee. I struggled with this at Google, where we were hiring people right out of college to do dull customer support work. I tried convincing them that we were “funding creativity a nickel at a time.”
One young woman who’d studied philosophy in college called BS immediately. “Look, the job is a little boring,” she said. “Let’s just admit that. It’s OK. Plutarch laid bricks. Spinoza ground lenses. Tedium is part of life.” I loved her approach to finding meaning, but it was unique to her. A slogan like “Spinoza ground lenses” would not have been inspiring for the broader team.
In a burst of Radical Candor, Financial Times writer Lucy Kellaway explained why she chose to work for the companies she did: “I went for JPMorgan and later for the FT because they were the only companies offering me a job. It seemed a great reason to pick them then. It is still a great reason today.”
If you're not passionate about your job, remember, there’s nothing wrong with working hard to earn a paycheck that supports the life you want to lead. That has plenty of meaning.
A wise man once told me, “Only about 5% of people have a real vocation in life, and they confuse the hell out of the rest of us.”
In a recent piece in Harvard Business Review from Professors Howe, Jachimowicz, and Menges, they note that while passion is an important factor to consider when choosing a job, it’s not the only factor.
Instead of asking “How can I find a job that I’m passionate about?” try asking “How can my career be a conduit to passion?” Reframing the question this way frees you up to honestly weigh the pros and cons of pursuing your passion through work.
Consider the Japanese concept of IKIGAI — a state of well-being that arises from devotion to activities one enjoys that also bring a sense of fulfillment.
A story about Christopher Wren, the architect responsible for rebuilding St. Paul’s Cathedral after the Great Fire of London, explains what I mean.
Wren was walking the length of the partially rebuilt cathedral when he asked three bricklayers what they were doing. The first bricklayer responded, “I’m working.” The second said, “I’m building a wall.” The third paused, looked up, and then said, “I’m building a cathedral to the Almighty.”
Many people use this story to celebrate the person who has a sense of vision and can imagine his individual efforts as part of a grand collective enterprise. In current-day Silicon Valley, inspirational slogans run more along the lines of “putting a ding in the universe,” as Steve Jobs put it.
But motivations are highly personal. Although I admire Jobs, it seems to me that the universe, or at least our world, is plenty dinged up already. So, I don’t find his call to put a “ding in the universe” inspirational, though others do.
Sure, it’s a boss’s job to put the team’s work in context, and if you share why the work gives you meaning, that can help others find their own inspiration. But remember, it’s not all about you.
A wise man once told me, “Only about 5% of people have a real vocation in life, and they confuse the hell out of the rest of us.'"
For me, the most instructive part of Wren’s story is that he didn’t come up with a sense of purpose himself and pound it into everyone’s head.
Each bricklayer cared about something different, even though all three were working on the same thing. Wren’s role was to listen, to recognize the significance of what he heard, and to create working conditions that allowed everybody to find meaning in their own way.
She says, “In those jobs, you didn’t have to pretend to like it. If you’re smiling while mining coal, I want to know what drugs you’re on because that stuff is not fun. That expectation was just not there.”
Trying to describe a job in lofty, save-the-world terms is often going to make you look like the ridiculous Hooli CEO Gavin Belson from the show Silicon Valley.
This brings us back to the main point — your job is not to provide purpose or demand folks be passionate about their jobs. Your job as the boss is to get to know each of your direct reports well enough to understand how each one derives meaning from their work.
*This post about why you don't have to be passionate about your job was updated Nov. 27, 2024.
Demanding passion places unnecessary pressure on both bosses and employees. Most people don't have a deep vocational calling — as the post notes, only about 5% of people have a real vocation in life. When managers insist on passion as a job requirement, it can feel inauthentic and even alienating. There's nothing wrong with working hard to earn a paycheck that supports the life you want to lead — that has plenty of meaning on its own. Your job as a boss isn't to manufacture purpose; it's to understand what actually motivates each person on your team.
Get to know each person well enough to understand how they individually derive meaning from their work. The post uses the story of Christopher Wren and three bricklayers to illustrate this: each bricklayer found different meaning in the same task. Wren's role wasn't to impose a single vision — it was to listen and create conditions where everyone could find meaning in their own way. As a Radical Candor-informed manager, your job is to have real conversations with your direct reports and understand what drives each one, rather than pushing a one-size-fits-all motivational narrative.
IKIGAI is a Japanese concept describing a state of well-being that comes from devotion to activities you enjoy that also bring fulfillment. It maps four intersections: what you love and are good at (passion), what you love and the world needs (mission), what the world needs and you can get paid for (vocation), and what you're good at and can get paid for (profession). The post suggests using IKIGAI as a reframe — instead of asking 'How do I find a job I'm passionate about?' ask 'How can my career be a conduit to passion?' This opens up a more honest, balanced way to think about work and meaning.
Yes, absolutely. The post is direct about this: there's nothing wrong with working hard to earn a paycheck that supports the life you want to lead, and that has plenty of meaning. Financial Times writer Lucy Kellaway summed it up candidly — she chose her employers because they were the ones offering her a job, and she still considers that a great reason. Not every role needs to align with a deep personal passion, and pretending otherwise creates unrealistic expectations for both employees and managers.
Sharing why the work gives you meaning can genuinely help others find their own inspiration — but it's only one data point, not a mandate. The post warns against bosses who pound a single sense of purpose into everyone's head. Motivations are highly personal; what's inspiring to one person (like Steve Jobs' 'putting a ding in the universe') may feel hollow or even off-putting to another. The Radical Candor approach is to share your perspective while staying curious about what actually matters to each individual on your team.
Instead of asking 'How can I find a job I'm passionate about?' the post encourages you to ask 'How can my career be a conduit to passion?' This reframe is important because it decouples your job from being the sole source of fulfillment in your life. It frees you to honestly weigh the pros and cons of your work without feeling like something is wrong if you're not fired up every day. Even Stanford scientists and Oprah agree that it's unrealistic for companies to demand passion as a job requirement.
Three ways to put this into practice.
Related reading
The recent viral TikTok trend, the “lazy girl job,” is the latest evidence that Gen Z is tired of hustle culture.
You might think that giving and getting feedback should be simple, right? Why would you need a feedback workshop? At Radical Candor we like to say...
By Nahla Davies, a software developer and tech writer. Before devoting her work full-time to technical writing, she managed—among other intriguing...